Some of the wise persons or the great thinkers said that ‘’there exist certain things that live with you’’ and perhaps one of the things are change. My past life in the college was full of freedom, and I used to set do what I want at my own time. For example, one specific day at college I decided to develop a spiritual routine in my calendar including waking up early in the morning at down reading the Bible, meditating on the word and perhaps pray for some minutes. In addition to the spiritual development, I used to record my daily programs and organize the plans and budgets. These activities helped me to gain control over my life and build a momentum that encouraged me to live expected life. The process continued over and over and became part of my life and schedule, and this helped me to my personal life and education at the institution through gaining a balanced life. It is quite important for a person especially the students to live a balanced life since this will allow you to achieve your dreams and life purposes and get the best spiritual life.
However, things turned to something else when I went into an internship program as a nurse in one of the best public health care in the United States of America. The white things at the college were no longer white it turned to something else. The experience was different even on my first visit, where we were introduced to a new policy of the hospital. These involved what you need to do and what not to do. We were taught things like how to handle the sick through your conversation and perhaps how to manage the shock since some of the people like me have never seen a person leaving the earth in other words dying. The process of teaching was so shocking and terrifying as I thought and imagined the whole process of watching a person dying. These all process was just like a dream to me, but I had to move on and accept the situation at that time.
The freedom ended, and I had to do things the way the administration wants it. My daily workout sheet could not help me now, and also the kind of friends I had to manage was very different from the ones at a school since these were professionals and the reasoning was different. I worked for some time trying to cope up with the culture and the situations at hand. However, one day something happened that shocked me. One patient arrived at the hospital with some people; the patient was convulsing a lot and sweating. So I thought I could handle the situation since the doctor was not around. Unfortunately, I don’t know what happened; the patient died in my hands and from that day I was never myself again, the guilt was so much that I couldn’t control it and I had to seek for a counselor.
Factors that affect reaction to change
First, the family upbringing refers to our attitude towards change. It is very clear that a person who grew up in a family who allowed the children to move from one place to another interacting with different people will automatically react differently to the changes. For example, I come from a family where a conversation with the neighbors was forbidden. My mother would beat you when he finds out that you defied her orders. These factors affected me so much to the extent that interacting with other people especially the doctors in the hospital difficult. Another thing, in my life, have never seen a person dying, and for the first time during an internship program I broke up the experience and this puzzled me. The families in the society should allow the children to explore different worlds and interact with various people. Suppose my mother could have allowed me to communicate, I wouldn’t have experienced the challenge.
Second, is the age and values which explain that a person will tend to resist change when he or she has grown to a certain adult age. The children to respond different to the changes and they are very flexible and not adamant compared to the adults. Suppose I was still a child at the workplace, I would not be affected by the death experience at a place of work and also by the tight schedule that was set by the administration. Due to the age that I have attained, it was tough to accept the situations at the workplace, and this gave me a hard time in my place of work. I was unable to abandon the other routine at the college to embrace and adopt the current routine in the health care service. The age and my values could not allow me to work peacefully due to the change in the environment.
Third is the past successes and failure, the ways through which we encounter variations in the past will automatically determine how we respond to the current experiences to change. For example when I decided to modify and live a spiritual life and a good descent life. I made the change myself and decided to embrace the change. So definitely in my life, I believe that changes can only come from one-self and not initiated by the other party. The attitude affected me so much at the workplace, where the policy was to control and guide your working process. I thought the administration would allow me to decide for myself when to come to work and what to do, just like in the college it was up to you to go for the lecture or stay back in the rooms. The change in these situations in the health care marveled me and it very vivid that I was in the different environment. These affected my deliverance power since my confidence was no more; everything was just like a nightmare and shocking. I thought I was on another different earth and this made me miss the school environment.